Today, I fucked up… by throwing a pregnant spider at my TV

today-ifuckedup:

So there I was, minding my own business watching the new Rick and Morty episode in my bed when my dog walked happily into my room.

He slowly walked over and sat next to me on the floor, it was that moment I started to regret every choice I took. He was trying to lick something on his upper nose area, my light was off so at the time it just looked like a black heap of something. I grabbed it and in that instant second, I realised what I had done.

I still shudder to imagine that beast, just imagine touching a hairy rock that has long, hairy legs and the sudden feeling of horror and dread mixed up in one giant ball of fear. It felt like slow motion, even though I knew what was in my hand I lifted my hand closer to make sure it wasn’t just some rotted kiwifruit.

I was wrong.. Oh, I was very, very wrong.

I shrieked louder than a crying infant and with all the power the seven gods could muster I threw that monster across the room with great power. It flies right next to my Tv and into my Tv cabinet, all I hear is a small thud and hundreds of tiny hairy pebbles hitting the base of the cabinet.

I knew this couldn’t be good.

I very carefully crept over to my door and turned on the light. Why , oh god why did I turn on the light. There in front of me, hundreds of small dark, hairy creatures scattered my entire floor and Tv. Funny, isn’t it? The one place I can truly feel safe in has turned into an insane asylum. I grabbed my laptop, luckily it was in arms reach and ran out of there screaming.

Even though I can never return, I suppose I do get to finish the Rick and Morty Episode.

by 

George-Lube-King

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