is a menstrual cup. You may know it as the “blossom cup” (excuse me while I hurl).
A size small is 2.4in (6.22cm) long, including the nubbin, and 1.6in (4.2cm) diameter. It’s made of soft silicone, holds around 0.7oz or 4tsp (20ml) of liquid, and looks about this big:
(pardon my shaky hands, but i’m not taking it back out for a better picture. anyway.)
This fucking thing? Basically solved my shark week dysphoria. First you get it wet (so it goes in easy), then you fold one of three ways.
The C-fold (easy mode):
The 7 fold (moderate):
Or the Origami fold (fancy):
Then you stick it in that hole that’s been so annoying this week. If you can feel it, you did it wrong. Stick a finger up there, beside the cup, and make sure it unfolded. It’ll probably open by itself, but it’s good to make sure.
Then guess what. You don’t have to worry about it til your next bathroom break!
Depending on how heavy your flow is, you might not have to worry about it until you go to bed. And it’s safe to sleep in too!
When you wanna take it out, you just grab that little nubbin at the bottom and pull. If the suction doesn’t release you might want to stick a finger in there to help it out, but I just keep pulling. It might also help to twist it a little.
Dump it, rinse it, wipe yourself clean, then stick it back in and forget about it again.
It’s like $16 on Amazon rn
And it comes in a bunch of colors:
so you can pick your favorite!
It comes with instructions:
And a carrying bag that is so much brighter irl:
It’s like, really feminine. But you obvs don’t have to use it if that’s not your thing.
TLDR:
The Blossom Cup is so much better than it sounds, and it may help with the moon week blues.
????? This is the guy in my English class that I only contact when I wasn’t in class. It’s too early for this.
If you’ve had some creep send you something worse than this, please let me know.
So he forgot he requested me on Facebook…I messaged his mother.
You know you fucked up when your mom tells someone to call the police about your ridiculous behavior because she tried but she is DONE, you’re supposed to be a man by now.
The amount of times I could have been that white girl in the horror movie could honestly be a movie in itself and it’s honestly a waste that my entire life isn’t constantly recorded on film because it would be HILARIOUS
1. That one time I decided to see what was past the old gate in the woods, but when got there it had been smashed in half and there was a decapitated sheep head with no skin just off the trail, so instead I just turned around and went home.
2. That time some friends and I went camping and we found a pile of bones wrapped in a garbage bag buried under a log, but the adult supervisor told us it was nothing, so we just put it back and didn’t talk about it again.
3. The time I was getting chased through the woods at night and I realized “wait it’s dark as fuck” so I just held still until the guy gave up and left.
4. The time this dude said he was in love with me and so he was going to cut my head off and dump my body in a lake, so I told him to grow the hell up, but then he got caught stealing girl’s underwear a day later and I never saw him again
5. That one time in college where I was taking a shortcut on my home at night and a car followed me into a dark alley, so I stared directly into the driver’s side of the window and walked towards it to psych them out
6. The night I was out on a walk and this old guy told me he’d locked his keys in his truck and that he needed someone my size to crawl in through the back window for him, so I told him “you know that sounds super suspicious right” and told him where to find a pay phone for a tow truck instead
7. The one time this random guy on the street said he was in love with me and so he was going to follow me home on my bus, so I clapped him on the shoulder and told him that if he got that close to my bus then I was going to throw him under the wheels, but then this really nice homeless man from Nigeria told the guy to fuck off and then checked to make sure he didn’t follow me onboard
8. That big cat with yellow eyes who I found in a well and brought home who used to put rotting meat in my closet and wake me up by chewing on my face, until I put him back outside and never saw him again.
9. My one cousin who used to come over for the summer who kept calling me ‘piñata’ and hitting me with sticks, until he went back home and was sent to juvie cause he finally got caught torturing animals
10. The time I got lost on the way to a meeting and wound up at a circus tent instead, and got followed by a full-out clown for three vacant street blocks
11. The pet hamster I had when I was seven who would scream all night and eventually escaped by ripping a bar out of its cage and wiggling through the hole. My mom caught it and put it back but it lived another year and a half until one night the screaming just stopped
12. The time I was whistling in the woods and something started whistling back, so I went home
13. That one night at summer camp where a group of girls got together to play ‘bloody mary’ in the lavatory and invited me to come with them so I said “no thanks” and stayed with the camp councillors and drank soup instead.
14. The old abandoned house I just moved into with the door that leads into a big empty room full of dirt and empty cooking pots that I just sort of… locked up forever and never go near
15. Once when I was at an ihop I saw a coffee mug do a full 360º spin with nobody touching it, so I said ‘that was neat’ and never ate there again
16. The time I took a photo of a big old raven sitting on the crucifix on top of the old town church cause it was the most goth thing I’d ever seen, right? But then it swooped down towards me, so I apologized immediately for being rude, and I felt a little silly for a while but the car that hit me on the way home didn’t even leave a bruise so idk be nice to birds
OP died in every single one of these events, this is just their ghost sharing their story
Did I ever tell u guys about the time my ex legitimately thought he killed me with his dick???
Ok so picture this I’m 18 and excited about sex, trying out some new positions. We are having sex in a pretty similar position to this
And my pussy is so wet it might as well be a god damn Slip N Slide ok. And he’s pounding at it fast and hard but slips out and goes to go right back in… But something is wrong. He’s about to enter….
The. Wrong. Hole.
And my eyes widen, I go to shout “noooo!!!!” But it’s all happening too fast. He thrusts right into my unlubed asshole and I scream like murder and leap right up onto my feet.
We had only been dating a couple of months at this time and there was something very important he did not know about me: I am a chronic fainter. If I’m in pain or if I see my own blood, I will pass the fuck out. I get real quiet and turn to him and say, “I am going to pass out.”
He doesn’t know I’m serious, he thinks I’m just being emotional, and he’s like “no baby come here” but as he finishes that sentence i faint and my head ping pongs off my metal bed frame, onto the wall and then finally my whole body falls on the ground.
He has never seen anybody faint before and naturally assumes I’m dead. A couple minutes later I awaken to him sobbing into my naked chest. Like this motherfucker really thought he sent me to the grave with some accidental anal sex.
Harry Potter star Dan Radcliffe has issued some criticisms against Warner Brothers and the film’s production team for continuing to employ Johnny Depp despite the allegations made against the Grindelwald actor.
“I suppose the thing I was struck by was, we did have a guy who was reprimanded for weed on the [original Potter] film, essentially, so obviously what Johnny has been accused of is much greater than that.”
me @ danrad
I appreciate that he’s just very “you fired a teenager for smoking weed but you’re going to defend a wife beater? Thanks for the job and everything but fuck all of you.”
misterjazzmaster 